December 23, 2013
Meet the #MaleMonday: Brian
Brian's fave holiday movie, ultimate dinner party & Christmas wish—all tied up in a big #MaleMonday bow
If this morning’s episode of Ask #MaleMonday has shown us anything, it’s that Brian Shimansky is a man with a plan—and a jawline you could probably crack coconuts on. He’s made us granola, he’s fixed our last-minute gifting woes, and now finally, we get to know him a little better. Stay tuned, the final episode of Ask #MaleMonday holiday series airs next Monday!
Age, star sign, day and night job: 27, virgo, custom-shelving specialist, and poet.
Hobbies: Photography and acoustic guitar
Best piece of advice you’ve ever been given and by whom:
“Say farmer, where does this road go?” “Well, I’ve been living here all my life and it ain’t gone nowhere yet.” —Andrew T. Mobile Brown
Describe your ultimate dinner party:
I’d invite Leonard Nimoy, Rock Hudson, Faye Dunaway, Paul Newman, Bill Clinton, Tina Fey, Bill O’Reilly, Warren Beatty, Jay Z, Beyoncé and Blue Ivy, Jack Nicholson, David Hasselhoff, James Goldstein, Kevin Garnett, Claude and Mario Lemieux, my two brothers, my mom and dad, Aunt Nancy, and Gram, A.T.M Brown, Big C, Mr. Smolin, My Buddy Bomber, Tim Allen, Tom Hanks, Brittany Franklin, Clint Eastwood, Jim Henson, Benjamin Franklin, Nikola Tesla and my dog, Amber, from a previous life.
The entire meal would be dessert by my buddy Crosby Wehr—master of gluten-free, sugarless yet delicious, highly nutritious chocolate and coconut puddings and cookies. I would provide a sultry maple almond coconut granola. We’d drink low toxin coffee, rooibos teas, and peaty scotch from the Isle of Jura, then talk about the current state of affairs in modern communication, healthcare, neuroscience, geopolitics, twerking, job creation, online dating, iTunes, Walmart, and the Knockout Game. The Tempations, Mumford and Sons, and Michelle Ross would transport us with their music.
I mean, that was pretty vague, but sure we’ll take it. You’re stranded on a tropical island, what are your three essentials?
Cutting-edge handheld water purification system, a carbon steel Leatherman multi-tool, and 1 ton of coconuts- but if there were already coconuts on the island, a small volleyball.
Your motto in life:
Keep it simple stupid, send it
Looks like someone’s been reading Sous Style. Keep it simple sexy is the ONLY way. What’s the best holiday gift you’ve ever received?
Nerf Super Ball Blasters, Nerf Extreme Dart Bow, with a jar of homemade granola taped to the side of the box
Have you ever met Santa?
Yeah, I met the guy a few times. It always irked me how he never had an answer for the speed and precision of his one-night delivery system when the post office is bankrupt and billion dollar businesses are still trying to figure it out. You’d think they’d all be at the mall taking notes from this guy… then I figured it all out.
If money weren’t an object, what would you buy your mom this Christmas?
The ability to walk again.
Favorite meal during the holidays, and who makes it?
Gram’s sausage and chestnut stuffing
Favorite holiday movie?
Home Alone, “Guys, I’m eating junk and watching rubbish! You better come out and stop me!”—that’s why.
Finish this sentence: All I want for Christmas is…. a warm fire and my family.
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