OKCupid’s Most Desired Man

We get the who, what & where of dating in NY with a MM most certainly in the know!

Dating in New York City is a nightmare, take it from us. (Why else do you think we created the #MaleMonday series? At the end of the day, all we really want to see is a cute dude in the kitchen!) So, when we read that OKCupid had named their top four most successful profiles, we need to know more/everything about the straight guy in the line up! Some light stalking later and we found, James Hawver aka MyTiesAreSkinny. We talk the importance of good text banter, where to go on a first date, and what to talk about, below.

So, James! Give us your profile stats:
Age: 29
Star sign: Capricorn
Occupation: Real estate agent

Aside from always swiping right and always giving 5 stars, how would you describe your online dating strategy?
I actually tossed that strategy soon after the New York Magazine article was published. It was supposed to be more efficient, but I was receiving upwards of triple-digit matches a day and spending more time reviewing than chatting. Now, I wouldn’t even consider my strategy a strategy. It’s less of a process than a natural progression. I look for someone I think is cute with an appealing style and common interests. Good texting banter is a must. If it’s there, we set up a date.

What’s the first thing you notice about a woman from her profile photo?
It depends on the composition of the photo. This question is setting me up to fail, so that’s all I’ll say…

And what are the first four things you notice about a woman, IRL?
Her walk, posture, eye-contact, smile.

So you’re an old hat at this dating game by now. What’s the weirdest date you’ve been on?
It was actually last week at the Union Square W Hotel. She just didn’t show up. But the server and I made good light of it.

Eish, and the best date?
Three hours of the most entertaining back-and-forth with the loveliest, most delightful woman. It was a recent Monday night at Attaboy on the Lower East Side. We talked a lot about Game of Thrones and barely about ourselves. I got lost with her.

Ah Game of Thrones never fails! Where’s the best place in New York and Brooklyn for a first date?
In a bar, anywhere with a touch of class that is relatively quiet: Attaboy, Otheroom in the West Village, Raines Law Room and The NoMad Library in Flatiron, The Auction House on the Upper East Side. The Ides rooftop bar at the Wythe Hotel in Williamsburg can get a bit crowded, but it’s a great spot to watch the sunset on the Manhattan skyline. Speaking of Williamsburg, the Brooklyn Flea and Smorgasburg are great for daytime dates. So are galleries and museums. Save dinner for a second or third date.

First date go-to conversation topics?
I now only set up a first date with a woman with whom I have common interests and playful banter via text. It’s then more likely we can jump back into that silliness when we meet. I want conversation, not an interview.

When you travel do you use online dating?
No. I usually travel to see family or friends, so I want to spend as much time with them as possible.

Rate all of the dating apps out of 5 stars: 
Tinder: 4
eHarmony: I’d rather discover compatibility through conversation than a long test.
Grouper: Fun concept, but I’d rather meet one-on-one.
How Bout We: 3
Glimpse: Haven’t heard of it.
Hinge: Ditto.

Though, the app through which I meet the woman who makes me want to delete all of my profiles will get five stars…

Some day your princess will come! Let’s talk love stories: What’s your favorite romantic comedy?
Any interaction between Russell Brand and Jonah Hill in Forgetting Sarah Marshall. That’s a cop-out answer, isn’t it?

Yah, totally. So here comes another one: Which male character are you most like from Sex and the City: Mr Big, Aidan, Steve, or Richard?
Should I admit that I’ve never seen the show? I choose whichever one has the fewest non-redeeming qualities 😉

Photography by Camilo Fuentealba 

What do you think, ladies? Swipe left or right? Comment below! Pippa@sousstyle.com